do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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