I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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