I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
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