I think scott just propositioned me for sex
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize