Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize