You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
His nipple licking is glorious
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