new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Randomize
