how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
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