I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize