you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
