At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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