Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Enjoy the penises
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize