My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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