So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
