he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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