Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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