Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
