Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I'm so fucking centered right now
Ketchup is God's man juice
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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