dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
i out mim tonsoeep
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
