You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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