I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
