THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
