I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
