How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
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