My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize