Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
