I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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