You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
