"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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