Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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