Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
