She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
