My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Yo dont text me then not text me
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize