dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
