Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize