My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
