Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I just had sex on a roof
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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