if you like me you must not know who I am
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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