could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
