no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
