this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
