love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
