It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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