I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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