Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
