Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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