actually, I'm a sock model
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I'm going to jail i love you
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
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