Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
