quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
