He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
whose parrot is this?
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
