I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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