The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize